Sex and the Conservative Nudist

I can’t take it anymore!  I have to toss in my two cents on the topic!  Ugh!

The demise of my favorite online magazine has left a vacuum in this world.  Its ability to seamlessly allow nudity and sexuality to exist made it a joy to read each month.  It allowed the reader to be turned on by beauty – whether that beauty was Spanish Mission architecture of the lobby at some nudist resort or the concierges’ chest.  My hope is that the maker of GoNaked Magazine lives long and influentially because his was a unique voice in the cacophony of conservative nudism.  Sir, I have plans to pick up your mantel as G&N also plans, and it may take both magazines to fill the void of your departure from the scene.

Ok, so sex and the conservative nudist… huh?  This concept that nudism isn’t about sex and that nudiquette puts the eyes anywhere but the groin and the towel between any surface and the buttocks is almost as ridiculous as Catholic school uniforms’ ability to focus teenagers while in class.  No amount of social construct will ever change human nature and the political spin on sexuality being a non-issue only gives the textiles ammunition when someone violates these sacred vows.

People like sex!  People are sex… among other things.  That’s the real problem, sex being some kind of garment taken off with one’s drawers rather than an element of a person like wit or wisdom.  Even contemplating the possible removal of sexuality from one’s personality is cause for the men in white coats.  It’s denial at best and instantly proves textiles “right” whenever some nudist spouts something as delusional as nudity isn’t about sex.

Perhaps it’s because I’m American; perhaps it’s because I’m a man; or perhaps it’s because I’ve taken just enough psychology and sociology courses to have learned something obvious. People don’t stop being sexual persons just because they paid money for a suite at a resort.  The view from that balcony doesn’t stop being beautiful just because a nun in a habit views it, nor does a classically proportioned and muscled person stop being arousing just because they’re nude.

This doesn’t mean wolf whistles are somehow acceptable.  A woman hearing about the shape of her ass is just as offensive while lounging in a cabana chair as when passing a construction site.  I don’t expect anyone to accept as flattery a man announcing his erection is caused by some visually stunning example of humanity.  This is manipulative behavior regardless of one’s state of dress – an attempt to control another by asserting dominance through shame.  True flattery has always been far more subtle than “Hey Baby! You going somewhere?”

A year ago I went to summer camp.  A year ago I shed my clothes for a week straight amid two hundred other gay men and enjoyed a vacation just as much as my father fishing in winter-wear with his brothers on some tundra lake.  I met many men, I saw many nude bodies, and I judged them all.  I classified each in degrees of beauty and accessibility.  I calculated cost versus reward.  Then I went back to my suntan pool-side.  The arousal was all mental, private, and meaningless.  Since men often get an erection after they’re dead such displays are poor indicators.  Yet there’s no denying the behavior.  In fact, the most overtly sexual advance I witnessed (during the day as the expectations changed as midnight neared) was a man commenting on my testicles’ size previously unnoticed when such an oversight seemed unlikely.  That’s it.  No “Hey baby” references, no aggressive commentary, just mild surprise he didn’t make the mental note previously.  We laughed.

To make this observation, and to have not made it previously, he obviously was looking at my groin.  Now since all behavior is a choice, he was looking at my groin for a reason.  He was judging me sexually, just as he did/does/will his customers while managing the department store he works for.  Some fill out their jeans better than others and that pleases him.

It’s the possibility he would judge me harshly or unfavorably that I fear.  It is for that reason the conservative nudist denies sexuality at their events.  Not because they want to be done with unwanted sexual advances – that happens anywhere, but because they have no means to obscure accurate judgement of their shame.  Should anyone and everyone agree my penis is too small I may just die of it.  Yet to claim the confidence to be socially nude in this society and then complain someone uses this new information to make more complete judgements (positively or negatively) is hypocritical and just as little delusional.

12 thoughts on “Sex and the Conservative Nudist

  1. I, too, miss GoNaked it was a breathe of fresh air to those of us living gay and naked in the hinterlands.

    1. Thanks for reading. G+N appears to be southern California based and may focus on those members. I’m in Florida and will have more contacts here. The magazine will also be only one part of a larger business including Web site design and development and online retail. My partner and I would also like to open a restaurant. Surely an accountant’s nightmare.

  2. Very thoughtful piece. And I totally agree that the “denial” approach is making a mockery of naturism – at least in America. People aren’t buying the story. I understand the historical perspective of the “conservative nudist,” in the efforts to separate nudity from sex, but social candor has changed while the story has not.

    Well done.

    1. Thanks. Jon Stewart is a bit of a hero of mine and I’ve taken his parting word to heart. “If you smell something, say something…” when it comes to hypocrisy and other forms of bullsh*t.

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